When major life events happen, people want to help.
One of the ways that people offer help is to give you stuff.
While often this is of great assistance, it can also be the producer of some not-so-great feelings.
Example: You’re having a new baby. (Yay!) Your friend offers you a gorgeous z00-themed crib bedding set. You have your heart set on an ocean-themed nursery (seahorses, anyone?!) yet you feel bad saying no, so you take it anyway.
Now you have a zoo-themed bedding set that sits in your baby’s closet unused.
You feel bad every time you open the closet because you haven’t used a perfectly good bedding set.
You feel bad when your friend comes over because you’re afraid she’s going to see you’re not using it and be offended.
You feel bad when you go to Goodwill, because you want to bring the set there and know someone else could use it, but don’t want to make your friend mad.
You feel bad when you see your friend because you feel bad that you didn’t use the set that she gave you at all.
That’s a whole lot of feeling bad! You have better feelings to feel.
The solution? Just say no.
When your friend initially offers it to you, you can so no. The good news: your friend is not going to hate or disown you.
There might be a minute or less of feeling bad for saying no. But there are also a lot of benefits. One, that’s valuable real estate in your baby’s closet. Two, your friend can consign that gorgeous bedding set and get some money. Three, another baby/mom (whose nursery theme IS the zoo) will enjoy it.
And you don’t have to feel bad for long. Not for months, anyway, just for a minute, which isn’t much, in the grand scheme of things.
Try it out and let me know how it goes!
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